Nursery Pictures and Baby Belly: Her Current and Future Homes!

Today, instead of just the regular diabetes check-up update, I really wanted to share some fun things, because well, I think I am kind of fun, and well there is more to me than diabetes :) So, here are some pictures of baby girl's nursery and an updated picture of me, in all my big belly glory!

Getting her nursery to where it is now has been a long process and it is still pretty messy in there, but it is all coming together!! These pictures were taken several weeks ago, so things have even changed since then, but hopefully after we accomplish a lo this weekend (hey, I said hopefully, didn't I...) I can take new pictures :) We've gotten so many wonderful things from so many wonderful people that her little bity room is quite full, haha!

Soooo, this is what we started with, after we emptied out the messy office/junk room stuff and somehow found a new place for it to all go, but before we got started with paint, new blinds, etc. It only took two coats of primer and two coats of paint to get the yellow covered...

...but we did it! We went with just a neutral paint color, mainly since we don't plan to live here forever and didn't want to have to repaint later on, and we also didn't want anything TOO pink, so we thought neutral was a good way to go. I think it makes a nice background for all of the dark furniture... It's actually not as white in person.

I told you it was still messy in there!! We've actually made several changes since these pictures were taken... Her crib and changing table are still on that same wall, but the secretary with the glass case on top is now moved to the wall opposite her crib and we have our glider in there, too, where the secretary used to be... next to the window, which is the big brown rectangle that actually kind of looks like a door in these pictures... It really is crazy how fast that little room filled up! Haha!

These are some little knobs that my Mom and I found for the new closet doors that we bought... and painted. They are just so cute and I love that they add a little splash of color and character.

And lastly we have her "new" closet, just about complete. We painted the inside, replaced and painted the closet doors, and then Brad had to move the hanging bar up a little, which took much longer than either of us expected, but he's proved himself to be a very specatular handy man once again! He definitely likes to show off for his girls :)

We also added two sets of drawers/shelves under the hanging rod... I'm still not quite sure yet how to organize it all; although I figure that will likely come when I know how the space will actually be used.

Now we just need to decorate!! We have lots of great things to put in her glass case and on her walls from our wonderful showers, and next we will add her curtains, bed skirt, bumper and bedding, which my Mom is working on (as we speak, actually :)). Here are the fabric samples of what we are using. The daisy pattern is her curtains, then the polka dot/brown is her bumper and skirt and the pink/white stripe is actually sheets that I have had forever that we are going to make into crib sheets for her! We aren't using the green and the solid brown is very soft minky that will be on the opposite side of her bumper and will be used for a blanket with the daisy pattern.

I can't wait to see it all complete! Baby girl definitely has the nicest room in the house and she'll be joining us in only about 3 more weeks!!!

And finally, an updated picture of my growing "baby bump"! Good thing this picture doesn't also capture my ankles.... which are quickly growing into tree trunks! YIKES!

Fallen off the Wagon...

Well, as some of you may have guessed by my absence, I haven't been the best about my diabetes care lately. Honestly, I think it all stemmed with my latest A1C. I think it was in August. It wasn't as horrible as it used to be, but it was about .2 higher than my last, and I had been trying SO hard to do well and keep things under control, but it didn't work. I feel like the goal of getting that number under 7 is impossible. I struggle too much on a daily basis to regularly do well. I mean, I can do well for weeks and weeks, and then for a few days I just stop. I don't check my blood sugar and I eat whatever I want, when I want, without bolusing accordingly.

How do I change that?? When I am motivated, I am so motivated. But when I struggle, I throw it ALL out of the window. I have recently decided that I am what I like to call "passionate" and I am very much a person of extremes. I also think I am very logical, but I have an obsessive personality and I over analyze just about everything. When I am happy, I am very happy and I take in the little things in life, but when I am mad, I get very angry, although it doesn't last very long. When I do well, I am perfect...maybe too perfect to sustain, and when I do poorly, I let everything go. I am obsessive in the sense that when I am doing well, in regards to blood sugar, dieting or exercise, I think about it constantly and don't give myself any slack. I can't stand it when my blood sugar is off for what seems to be no reason at all because it doesn't make sense. I don't like things that I can't control!! I am sure many of you share many of those same frustrations...

Why can't I find a happy medium in all of this. Why can't I do well without fearing that at any second my blood sugar will rise for no reason and I will lose all control over it. Why can't I accept the fact that I will NEVER be perfect in regards to my diabetes...or I guess anything else! I don't like to lose control over things; it scares me.

I am not going to return to deliberately making my blood sugar high, but I don't even want to be in a place where I can just "give up" when the going gets tough. I want to be in that place where there are no excuses and you just do as well as you can and just keep fighting. But how do I get there without feeling overwhelmed and frustrated? Does the frustration ever go away??

The last time I put my sensor in, I must admit, I did a lot better. I didn't let the information overload overwhelm me like I had in the past. I let it guide me and instead of checking my blood sugar 15 times per day, I just let myself trust that the sensor was doing its job and only checked when I needed to. I think if I just keep my sensor in and treating it as a tool to help guide me instead of something that I need to constantly be on top of and to keep checking to make sure my blood sugar is perfect at every second, I will do ok...

I suppose that is my plan. I am just ready to be alright with all of this and accept it for what it is, but I don't feel like this is ever even possible... I'll try to do better checking in on here. I know that always keeps me motivated :~)

How Weird Am I?

I must really be hitting the big time in the world of blogging! I was tagged with my first meme, haha!! Thanks Jillian (P.S. - You constantly amaze me)!!

Ok, here are the rules: After you are tagged, you write a blog about 10 strange, odd and unknown facts, habits or goals about yourself. After you are done, you pick 6 new people to tag and list their names, why you tagged them, and then leave a message for them saying that you have tagged them and they need to read your blog! You can't tag the person who tagged you, that would be cheating! But let that person know that you have posted your blog so that they can read all of your fun little tidbits!

1) I dissect my food. For example: pizza. First I eat the toppings, then the cheese, and then try to eat the sauce off. Next I peel the dough from the crust. I eat the crust first, unless I am full and then I will just throw it away. Then I eat my yummy gooey dough. Delicious!

2) I save my favorites for last...I discussed this in my Memories from my diagnosis post, as well. But yes, this is why the dough of the pizza is saved for last!

3) I LOVE to sing and dance. I have been laughed at because I will sing and dance to the radio in stores, come up with dance moves in the car and even sing and dance to commercials! It makes me extremely happy to crank up the music in my car and just sing my heart out...it is also fun while cleaning. I just can't help it! It is a power stronger than myself.

4) I spent three years in law school, passed the bar, and was sworn in as an attorney and have absolutely no desire to ever practice law, and I won't. I am an attorney in name only. I believe that being happy is so much more important than being stuck doing something that you don't love, regardless of the pay. Follow your heart and you will never be steered in the wrong direction. You may encounter bumps in the road, but there are bumps in EVERY road. =:~)

5) I chew on the insides of my cheeks. It started when I was nervous, but now it has become much more consistent; I think it became a true habit rather than a nervous habit during law school...since my nerves were constantly frayed! I've done it since I was little. I remember dance recitals where my Mom would tell me that the whole time I danced my mouth was contorted into a strange face with my lips pushed to one side as I chewed. I do it to this day...the inside of my mouth was completely raw for the bar exam!!

6) I play out random and bizarre scenarios in my head constantly. I am always acting out a made-up conversation or rehearsing a resolution to something that is bothering me. My husband says that I would be awesome in a courtroom, especially for direct examination of witnesses, because my arguments are always logical and I can always "get him", but that is because by the time I actually get to the REAL discussion, I have played it out a million times and perfected it. If he says something I wasn't prepared for then my brain turns to mush and I can't comprehend anything.

7) I am extremely logical and analyze everything and everyone. There is a logical explanation for everything (well except what causes Type 1 diabetes and cancer, of course). BUT I also think that people should listen to their hearts more. There is a constant battle between what logically makes sense and what makes sense inside. It is all about balance but the heart should always win.

8) I love to people watch and to get to know new people. People are the way they are for a reason and I love to analyze all of the possibilities. I used to work in a psych ward and it is just so interesting to see how different people react to the same thing. Schitzophrenia and multiple personalities amaze me because they are so illogical. Our brains are so amazing.

9) I love algebra. Finding x just makes me beyond happy. It is so much FUN!!! I also love balancing my checkbook...well, when I used a checkbook!

10) I hate naps. I wake up grumpy, groggy and confused. It is not a good thing...

Ok, that was really hard...probably because I am too logical and tried to analyze things too much. I'll throw another one in for fun, but only because you have all more than likely already realized this: I am VERY long winded!! haha!! An explanation has to come with everything =:~)

I tag: I forgot to add WHY!! Ooops!

Rachel - Because I think she is an amazing woman and I love to read about her story...I may be going through the same journey as she is someday and just knowing she is there makes me feel stronger.

Bethany - Because I think we resemble each other in so so many ways and it is so comforting to know that she understands. I am eager to find out about those little oddities about her that make her uniquely Bethany!

Brandy - Because she has created an amazing place for women with diabetes to go and talk about those things that affect only us as women. It is another place where I can let my insecurities go and feel completely welcomed. I know that she works SO hard, but I'd love to find out more about the person behind the action.

Laura - Because she has Type 1 diabetes and is pregnant with her THIRD baby!! I want to find out what makes this amazing woman tick...and well, I hope to BE her one day!

Windy - Because she has amazing advice about diabetes, being domestic AND being a diva!! I LOVE it!!

Kathryn - Because I am enthralled by her cooking, her gardening, and about learning more about her. She seems to be on the adventure of a lifetime and knows how to ensure that her life is full of the important things!

Yay!! Enjoy! =:~)