Reflections...

Writing my Diabulimia Column for DiabetesSisters has been hard. It's scary to go back to that place where I was so long ago...but it wasn't really that long ago at all. I wasn't in the depths of it all when I started this journey, but I was certainly not out of it. Looking back on how far I have come is exciting, though. I feel so much hope for my future and that is something that I never ever felt before. I didn't think I had a future and so I certainly didn't waste my time dwelling on it. But that was when I never knew how good life could be. I am truly at that top of the world right now, and I am not just waiting on the day I trip and fall back down to the bottom. It's an amazing feeling.

I have come to realize that I have the power and control to do whatever I want in my life. I am more confident in who I am, more sure of who I want to become, and more excited to see how it all plays out than ever before...and I have the most amazing husband to make that journey with me. I am in love with life right now, and it is great. It is still a little scary sometimes, but I feel ok with that. Looking back at how far I have come has made me realize that nothing can hold me back...unless I let it.

We all hold our futures within our grasps, we just have to take the reins.

Officially CGMing AND "sighting my toosh"!!!

Ok, so I accomplished two HUGE goals yesterday!! One, I got hooked up to my CGMS, and two, I put a site in my toosh!! Yay!

CGMS
Ok, I am so excited! As of right now, after 13 hours on my Minimed CGMS, I love it! Last night at 5:30, the trainer from MiniMed came over to my house to get me set up. Ms. MiniMedwas extremely nice and very helpful! I even learned a few more pump tricks! After going through all of the details on how it works and how I have to set up, we got started with putting the sensor in.

I am not going to lie, I had been looking at that big long huge needle since she arrived...ok, since before that and I was pretty terrified of sticking it into my stomach fat. Memories of my first time using my QuickSerter came flying back, except this needle is twice as long and seems to be twice as thick!! Oh the pressure was on...I just didn't think I could do it.

I loaded it up into the trigger thing and was all ready, or was I?? No way was I going to push that little white button that would result in this huge thing flying into my stomach that resembled nothing other than jumping off a fence and landing on a nail!! Ok, ok. I held it in place, made the very loud groaning noise that has become a necessity for each site change and click. Once again, not so bad!

But, I did bleed and I think the words "a lot" came out of Ms. MiniMed's mouth...eek! Why do I feel like I am going to be completely drained of all of my blood if I bleed anywhere other than my finger tips?? Is it just me? But it was fine and it stopped bleeding and everything is working fantastically.

Sure, it isn't completely accurate, but I don't think it has been off by more than around 40 points yet, so that is pretty good for me. Although, I haven't eaten a huge meal quite yet. Oh, and have I mentioned that the charts are totally cool!! So I am very excited to have my new little addition!! I know it will help me to stay on track, too, which is extremely important!

New Site Spot
While Ms. MiniMed was there, I mentioned that I ONLY put my sites in my tummy. Well, apparently that was taken as a challenge for me to explore new options!!! So, for the very first time in my life, I have a site in my toosh...and yep, I am converted!!! No more white circles all over my stomach and no more in the way sites!! Yay!!

So, all in all, yesterday was a very good day! My birthday weekend (now week??) was better than I ever thought it would be!